If you look at https://guix-hpc.bordeaux.inria.fr/browse? you'll find most of your wishes there, and many more to come hopefully.

Guix is also working on an installer to help reducing the friction. I'd personally like to work on a fully graphical install + package management.

While Guix sounds like some heavy scientific stuff, it really is a powerful base that allows anything to grow on top, including user-friendly interfaces.